adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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