Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
no you cant smoke seaweed
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
