I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Randomize