The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
