The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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