Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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