Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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