If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I've blown a few things in my day
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
