my vag is so smooth its legendary
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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