Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
