Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Of course I have a pirate flag
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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