i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I'm sobbing to NWA
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
