perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
