id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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