I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Randomize
