i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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