I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
