I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
