They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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