I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
