Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
