'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
