I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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