so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
