I just saw a hot homeless man
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
