i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
