Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Pants are for mortals
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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