New invention idea: vibrating tampons
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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