Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
