Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Randomize
