The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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