Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
