Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
