finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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