just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize