we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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