Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
