yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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