Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
