Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Sext me about skeletons
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
