I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize
