I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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