trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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