this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
