help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
