you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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