Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
