he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
