I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
