I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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